Week 2 Thursday Day 5 😕

A very dull and joyless day... Harriet wasn't really on form and john was being 'serous john' and I was just trying to do what I was told but seemed to be failing at every turn.... 

We had yet another set pointless tasks. One with hands clasped moving in a ferocious way. 

So in conclusion it been a challenging week. The only day I really enjoyed was doing duet work with Harriet. At last I felt like I was dancing. 

Still feeling like an underling not helped by John saying Debbie if you go behind Effie or behind Harriet or sometimes behind both of them (translation I don't like what you doing so let's hide you) 

Feel that I'm not giving John the movement quality he wants. 

He's not happy the dancers aren't happy and its all very flat.

BUT I am learning a lot and it has reinvigoured me. Although I am tired in the mornings and 7 hours in the studio in less than inviting I am always much better after class and actually feel more awake and alive than usual at the end of the day. My body isn't getting beat up, achy yes but not battered and bruised. I like the single minded nature of it. Get up go to work come home, eat bath bed. My brain is calmer... I guess when I'm not there I can switch off which is different to normal weeks as I'm always changing my head space to the next class. 

Would I do it again..... The dury is still out on this one.....